If you’ve found yourself interested in a bisexual woman but are unsure how to approach this dynamic with confidence and respect, you’re not alone. Dating someone who identifies as bisexual can be an exciting, fulfilling experience—but it’s also different from the standard rules you might apply elsewhere in the dating world.
Before jumping in, there’s one essential thing every man needs to know upfront—bisexuality isn’t a phase, and it isn’t about “choosing a side.” Approach with respect, curiosity, and the intention to really understand her as an individual.
Not sure where to start? Grab your coffee (or wine), and we’ll walk you through 7 essential tips to attract bi women the right way.
7 Essential Dating Tips for Men to Attract Bi Women
1. Throw Stereotypes Out the Window
First things first—ditch any preconceived notions or outdated stereotypes about bisexuality. The idea that bisexual people are “confused” or “greedy” is archaic and flat-out wrong. Believe us, she’s going to notice if you bring these misconceptions to the table.
Instead, focus on getting to know her as an individual. When you approach her with an open mind and without judgment, you’re already laying the groundwork for a better connection.
Pro-tip: Avoid bringing up clichés like, “Does this mean you like threesomes?” Not only is it cringe-worthy, but it also reduces her identity to a sexual stereotype—which is the fastest way to earn an eye-roll, not a date.
2. Lead with Respect, Not Fetishization
One major red flag women (of any sexuality) can sense instantly? Fetishization. It’s perfectly fine to be attracted to bisexual women—just make sure your interest is respectful and not purely performative.
Bisexuality isn’t some “wild card” you can play to make your dating experiences “more fun.” Make it clear that you value her for who she is, not just for her orientation.
A simple way to do that? Listen more, assume less, and engage in thoughtful conversations without turning every moment into a spectacle.
3. Be Confident, Not Cocky
Confidence is attractive—period. When you’re genuine, self-assured, and comfortable in your own skin, you’re creating the perfect space for her to feel the same around you.
But hold up—confidence doesn’t mean being cocky. Don’t treat this like a competition or see her past relationships with women as something you need to “win” against. It’s not a battle of “men vs. women.” Her choice to be with you is about you.
4. Ask Questions (And Actually Listen!)
Think about it—a bisexual woman, or anyone who identifies as LGBTQ+, likely has experiences that may differ from yours. Instead of assuming you know what her life is like, why not ask her?
But listen when she talks. Ask thoughtful questions about her views, relationships, and experiences. For example:
- “What’s the best thing about being part of the LGBTQ+ community for you?”
- “Are there any challenges you’ve faced being out and dating?”
The key? Be genuinely interested! When you show that you care about her world, she’ll be a lot more likely to care about sharing it with you.
5. Be Secure in Who You Are
We’re just going to say it—insecurities will get in the way fast. It’s okay if her past partners include both men and women. Don’t compare yourself to them or fall into a spiral of “what ifs.”
Here’s the truth that will set you free: If she’s choosing to spend time with you, it’s because there’s something about you that she likes. Own that confidence and don’t waste time feeling intimidated by her past.
And hey, being secure isn’t just about ignoring jealous tendencies—it’s also about handling rejection gracefully. If she’s not into you, don’t take it personally. (Pro-tip for dating anyone, anywhere, really.)
6. Show Your LGBTQ+ Allyship
If you’re serious about attracting a bi woman, it’s time to level up your allyship. Nothing makes someone feel safer and more understood than seeing a potential partner who actively supports their community.
How can you show that you’re an ally?
- Educate yourself on LGBTQ+ issues—don’t make her do all the explaining.
- Respect her pronouns (if she has any preferences) and the identity of her loved ones.
- Speak out against homophobia and biphobia when it counts—with friends, family, or in public spaces.
When she knows you’re someone she can trust and rely on, she’ll feel much more drawn to you.
7. Keep Things Fun and Authentic
Finally, the golden rule of dating always applies—enjoy it! Dating doesn’t have to be an overly complex dance of strategy and second-guessing. At the core of every connection is a spark of fun, shared laughter, and authenticity.
Instead of focusing on “how to get it right,” lean into the moment. Pay attention to her interests, surprise her with coffee from her favorite café, send her that meme she won’t stop laughing about—just be yourself.
Being with someone isn’t about “perfect techniques”; it’s about building a genuine bond over time.
Want a Lasting Connection? The Secret Is Respect
Attracting bi women—or anyone for that matter—is about more than just tips and tricks. It’s about meeting someone on an equal footing, showing empathy, and creating a space where they feel respected and valued.
By tossing out outdated stereotypes, being secure in yourself, and approaching her with an open heart (and a little humor!), you’re already setting yourself apart from the crowd. Trust us, she’ll notice.
Happy dating, and remember—fun, respect, and authenticity go a long way!
